That ‘food’ can kill your sexual urge

As marriage is important and meant for matured minds, so also is sex pleasurable. However, there are certain precautions that must be taken by both partners, which, if neglected, can affect their sexual relationship and performances, reports Dipo Ogunsola.

THE subject of human sexual health is one of the most discussed either publicly – for fun or boast for bed exploits, or privately with therapists or relevant medical personnel. Those who trivialise this very sensitive issue or regard it as a taboo to reveal what they suffer or lack in bed do themselves grave damage hence campaign against factors that hinder sexual performance has become one of those which generate interest of the public.

Repeatedly, it has been noted that addiction to alcoholism and smoking is a chief culprit among sex killers. In Macbeth, Shakespeare said alcohol “provokes the desire but takes away the performance.” According to basic scientific suggestion , when people of average weight drink more than two bottles of beer, cocktails or glasses of wine in an hour, alcohol interferes with erection in men and impairs sexual responsiveness in women. Smoking, it is said, narrows the blood vessels, impairing blood flow into the penis in men and increasing their risk of erection impairment. In women, the same mechanism limits flow in to the vaginal wall, decreasing lubrication.

However, Pa Julius Olutunde Fadeyi attacks these medical notions based on his personal experience. Pa Fadeyi does not only indulge in booze and chain smoking, he is a polygamist, keeping three wives under his roof. At 83, Pa Fadeyi , a retired civil servant informed Your Health that he is not found wanting in his sexual performance with his wives, the last two aged 52 and 38.

“I understand my first wife’s relunctance to sex. She is over 70 year, but my last two wives can testify to my performance on adding that bed.” adding that he is still active because he watches what he eats and maintains a strict lifestyle. I know I’m addicted to smoking and drinking, but I don ‘t fool round with my stomach. I lay emphasis on vegetables and fresh fruits and I keep fit by exercising, keeping a walk with some of my grandchildren at least eight hours a week.”

Sex counsellors also blame embarrassment factor, especially among ladies, as one of the issues which can hinder sexual urge. A female who has suffered disappointment from a previous relationship or has been raped one time or the other can become wild to male advances. Pam Scott, a sex therapist noted that lovers should always go into affairs realising that sex is not the most important ingredient in relationship.

Some people shirk in their “bed responsibilities” in stressful pursuit of task completion and, in case of professionals like journalists, the blind agitation to meet up deadlines. By the time they get home, they slump on the bed and the next time, they say hi to their spouses in the dawn of a new day. This Dr. Silke Dyer refers to as a dangerous trend in relationship. Dyer however calls on couples to avoid the trap of assigning time frame to everything they do saying “multi-tasking is for computers. We are all good at being busy and everything is tagged as urgent, but those arbitrary and unrealistic time constraints are self-imposed and simply make us more pressurised, anxious and stressed out. Give your companion undivided attention and take the time to get it right,” Dyer cautions.

Nothing kills sex desire like routine. When lovers see too much of each other in pyjamas, during illness, anger, despair, before they know it they are like brother and sister. It is no longer as fresh and exciting as when all seems new. Dr. Kamaldeen Agboluaje, a para-psychologist advises lovers to shake up their routine and renew their relationship using different technique.

“Don’t just assume sex has to happen in bed, at night or weekends” “adding that there was a need for a bit of foreplays and wining and dining together. “Warm bath, drinks of glass of wine and lying on bed together to take turns to gently stroke each other for fifteen minutes each are some of the steps to take to avoid routine”, he stressed.

Dyer is of the opinion that environmental toxins like Lead and other heavy metals as well as pesticides are a big problem to sexual potential especially in developing countries where regulations controlling their use are not stringent. He gave an example like endocrine disruptors like oestrogen, which may be fed to animals and thus found in the meat we eat . This can interfere with our sexual functions in a very adverse way. Scott also blames illness and injury as two of factors which can kill sexual desire.

“A blockage in the ducts of the testicles caused by repeated infection, certain foods or inflammations can cause a dead attitude to sex.” He also alluded to the fact that testicular trauma, surgery or infection can trigger an immune response in the genital which may damage sexual feelings in humans. Treating injuries with certain types of medications like amphetamines, variococeles can also cause hormonal dysfunctions. Athletes, musicians, artists and other related professionals, who use performance – enhancing drugs stand the risk of seeing their sexual desire fade after regular abuse.

Narcotics and tranquilisers are called “downers”. That is what happens to the sexual interest of drug addicts. Though cocaine use stimulates sexual desire, it also impairs organism, making sex decidedly frustrating. John Morganthaler, Director of Sex/Drug Interaction Foundation, in California believes that twenty per cent of all sex problems are caused by drug side effects or interactions. He recommends that one should ask his/her doctor and pharmacist about this possibility every time one gets a prescription. Some substances will set you back in bed. If you want to rev up your sex life, first make sure you don’t shut it down. Many everyday items can also interfere with pleasure in the sack.

source;www.tribune.com.ng